ANGRY YOGA

Listen there are a few things going on.  I took pictures of a pie I made that I want to show you.  I got a somewhat drastic haircut.  All these things will be discussed in future posts.  Just know, for now, that I really like my hair and I am eating entirely too much pie this week.

Most importantly, though: Cambridge, Massachusetts is KIND OF a liberal utopia.  You know.  The People’s Republic of Cambridge.  Evidently that’s what my father’s generation called my fair city (CAR TALK YOU GUYS, RIGHT?!).  Anyway.  Here’s something that’s happening.  The Cambridge Arts Council and the Cambridge Parking Authority have teamed up to put yoga poses on parking tickets.Now.  Okay.  Sure.  There are a few things about this.

1.) Parking tickets suck.  They suck.  Parking in Cambridge is really annoying and driving in Greater Boston is giving me gray hairs (in my cute new haircut).  I think this is a great way to turn people’s parking frowns upside down!  If everybody found something to chill them out in stressful situations the world would be a better place, probably.  And I really appreciate the effort.  And I REALLY appreciate living in a city where they would even bother with shit like this.  It’s not hurting anyone and it’s meant purely for the public good.  It’s promoting art and relaxation and that’s really great, I think.

2.) Or it could backfire and be super annoying in a “Oh are you annoyed by me right now giving you this parking ticket?  Do some yoga because that’s what’s good for you!  Try some green tea!  Here, have this wheatgrass shot!  Also, get some solar panels on your roof, stop being so selfish, use reusable grocery bags or you’ll be SHUNNED” kind of way.  Maybe we don’t need people pushing their liberal yoga agendas on us on our GODDAMNED parking tickets.  But also I love liberal agendas.  I’m just playing devil’s advocate.

3.) The real issue here is that I hate yoga.  I’m as liberal as they come.  I’m practically Green-Rainbow Party Candidate Jill Stein.  But I HATE YOGA.  I HATE IT.  IT MAKES ME ANGRY AND MORE STRESSED THAN I WAS BEFORE.  I did it a couple of times and I’m not flexible and I don’t like it because I don’t like doing things that I’m not good at.  So no, I will probably not be doing any yoga, whilst getting a parking ticket least of all.

What do you guys think?  Did they go too far?  Did they not go far enough?  Did they go just the correct distance?  Do you like yoga?  Why?  I think it’s terrible.

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6 Comments

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6 responses to “ANGRY YOGA

  1. Will

    I heard those reusable shopping bags have lead in them…

    Also, maybe they should just scan my fastlane thing instead of even telling me i have a ticket. It would get paid, and i wouldn’t get angry at all. Because I would never know about it. perfect.

  2. Mommy

    I like the yoga poses. I like yoga too but can’t commit to going to a class at the same time every Tuesday to learn how to do it right.

    I’m thinking though that Boston proper tickets would put a smiley face with it’s tongue blowing a raspberry at you on their tickets. They’re really nasty about parking.

  3. jslice

    i like them! butt… i heard that they discontinued them because people were so up-in-arms and against them. so they have like 50,000 or something and once those are gone, they’re going back to more conservative (BOOOOOOO!) ones. i hope you’re happy.

  4. receptionist

    No! Really? I like them. I wouldn’t want them to go away. I was just devil’s advocating. Why are people up in arms? This requires more research… To the internet!

  5. Billy

    As a Cambridge resident, I think that we should all stop driving cars and just get from place to place on our positive energy and good feelings. Anyone wanna meet up to protest carbon and drink kombucha later!?!?

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