Me: College of Fine Arts
Phone Lady: Hello I have some questions about your Doctoral programs in music.
Me: Ok, what are you questions? Maybe I can help you.
Phone Lady: When is the deadline for the application?
Me: January 15th
Phone Lady: What sort of TA-ships or financial aid do you offer?
Me: I can transfer you to our financial aid officer for that question.
Phone Lady: Ok, I just have a few more questions.
Phone Lady: Do you offer medical insurance for students?
Me: Yes, our financial aid officer can also help you with questions about that.
Phone Lady: Ok. How about day care for students with families?
Me: I don’t think we offer anything like that.
Phone Lady: You should.
Me: Um… yes, probably, you’re right.
Phone Lady: Lots of places do.
Phone Lady: MIT does.
Me: Sorry. We just…
Phone Lady: People have families.
Me: It’s not up to me. I just answer the phone.
Phone Lady: Ok. Can I speak with the financial aid officer?
I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT TO SAY TO YOU, CRAZY PHONE LADY! IF MIT JUMPED OFF A BRIDGE WOULD I HAVE TO JUMP OFF A BRIDGE, TOO?